(Matrimonialized is a term I have coined for someone who succumbs to the idea of finding "the one" by registering on a matrimonial site)
21 things I hate about being "matrimonialized"
1. Becoming an object for sale. The object gets picked depending on how appealing it is to the eye.
2.Taking extreme measures to write the” about me” column as honestly as possible, thus setting the in-built filter, out of fear of choosing the wrong guy.
3.Being judged by strangers (read as groom-to-be’s) + their parents + their siblings + their grandparents + their neighbours + their family friends+ pets etc.
4. Giving telephonic interviews to over-enthusiastic sister(s) even before their brother has seen your profile and given consent.
5. Facing rejection on a daily basis, to the extent that you think it’s a Deja-Vu!!!!!! (I swear!)
6. Uploading pictures in a given format (traditional, modern, casual) while most guys get away with just the modern/casual pics
7. Going to photo studio all dressed up and getting your picture taken and seeing a “glowing” version of you in a vaguely contrasted background in print.
8. Taking two pictures for the profile – One with glasses, one without glasses (What the?)
9. Finding someone with whom you can actually connect to (a very rare occurrence) and facing the big obstacle of the “kattams” and “rajju’s” and what not’s!( Kattam, Rajju - terms related to one's horoscope)
10. Becoming a “paid member” in all sorts of matrimonial sites (region wise, cast wise, intercaste wise, religion wise)
11. Facing everyone from your boss to your onnu-vitta athai (Distant aunt)inquiring about the progress made in matrimonial search (Suddenly your problem is everyone’s problem!)
12. Having to lie about your eating habits just because you feel that you would stop eating chicken once you start cooking it.
13. When everyone around you is busy getting married and you are busy planning about what to wear for their weddings and what pictures to take of yourself to post as profile picture in some matrimonial site.
14. Getting tired of “catching the attention” of the wrong types (Eg : You have caught the attention of so-and-so mails that flood your inbox)
15. Declining the interests sent by uncles (old men) and thinking for one fraction of a second if all this is even worth it!
16. Not getting replies for personalized messages and sending reminders to people demanding a reply! (thus establishing one's right in hearing a NO)
17. Fighting the urge to succumb to parental pressure,especially when your instincts are screaming “NO” to a particular groom-to-be's profile.
18. Your time of birth has more to say than you or your birth for that matter!
19. That people read “Inter caste” as “no caste” (Sigh India!)
20. You question the rationale behind proverbs like “don’t judge a book by it’s cover” or quotes imprinted in memory like “the universe conspires in helping you achieve it”, “If it’s meant to happen it will happen” etc
21. You keep searching for that one person with (diminishing) hopes that he is searching for you too!
21 things I hate about being "matrimonialized"
1. Becoming an object for sale. The object gets picked depending on how appealing it is to the eye.
2.Taking extreme measures to write the” about me” column as honestly as possible, thus setting the in-built filter, out of fear of choosing the wrong guy.
3.Being judged by strangers (read as groom-to-be’s) + their parents + their siblings + their grandparents + their neighbours + their family friends+ pets etc.
4. Giving telephonic interviews to over-enthusiastic sister(s) even before their brother has seen your profile and given consent.
5. Facing rejection on a daily basis, to the extent that you think it’s a Deja-Vu!!!!!! (I swear!)
6. Uploading pictures in a given format (traditional, modern, casual) while most guys get away with just the modern/casual pics
7. Going to photo studio all dressed up and getting your picture taken and seeing a “glowing” version of you in a vaguely contrasted background in print.
8. Taking two pictures for the profile – One with glasses, one without glasses (What the?)
9. Finding someone with whom you can actually connect to (a very rare occurrence) and facing the big obstacle of the “kattams” and “rajju’s” and what not’s!( Kattam, Rajju - terms related to one's horoscope)
10. Becoming a “paid member” in all sorts of matrimonial sites (region wise, cast wise, intercaste wise, religion wise)
11. Facing everyone from your boss to your onnu-vitta athai (Distant aunt)inquiring about the progress made in matrimonial search (Suddenly your problem is everyone’s problem!)
12. Having to lie about your eating habits just because you feel that you would stop eating chicken once you start cooking it.
13. When everyone around you is busy getting married and you are busy planning about what to wear for their weddings and what pictures to take of yourself to post as profile picture in some matrimonial site.
14. Getting tired of “catching the attention” of the wrong types (Eg : You have caught the attention of so-and-so mails that flood your inbox)
15. Declining the interests sent by uncles (old men) and thinking for one fraction of a second if all this is even worth it!
16. Not getting replies for personalized messages and sending reminders to people demanding a reply! (thus establishing one's right in hearing a NO)
17. Fighting the urge to succumb to parental pressure,especially when your instincts are screaming “NO” to a particular groom-to-be's profile.
18. Your time of birth has more to say than you or your birth for that matter!
19. That people read “Inter caste” as “no caste” (Sigh India!)
20. You question the rationale behind proverbs like “don’t judge a book by it’s cover” or quotes imprinted in memory like “the universe conspires in helping you achieve it”, “If it’s meant to happen it will happen” etc
21. You keep searching for that one person with (diminishing) hopes that he is searching for you too!
1 comment:
Except for 19, I could relate to everything on a real personal level Sow. And I can't agree more on 4 and 11. Finding a soul mate or a life partner - It doesn't really matter to these sites. They do a very diluted match and all that we are left with are doubts on the concept of holy, binding matrimony.
Psst! This is my third time trying to comment on your blog. The Universe has its own sweet way of restoring balance :)
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